Another Big thing

So over the last few weeks, the whole of my existence has been changing rapidly--rearranging itself in a lot of ways. In six months, I'll be a dad. Seven months ago, I became a homeowner. We have a car payment, and bills and live in a dense suburbia type area. We have a Wii and Cable Tv (well the Discovery channel at least), and a rowing machine and some karate mats down in the basement. All these changes have really gotten me to thinking about myself and my future and my role in this big ole game called life that Milton Bradley copyrighted before I was born.

So all this thinking has really kept me up later at nights and generally opened my eyes, if you will, to the world around me. I've come to realize that I'm pushing myself way too hard. All this reading books and trying to write stories with some vain vague notion that I'll somehow make a difference. Really it's silly. And selfish.

So I've decided that I'm going to give up on writing completely. And reading for that matter. I'm also going to give up on this blog, because it too involves writing. Instead, I'm going to do like everyone else in America: Vote the Republican Ticket, let New Conservatism take over and rule the country hand in hand with the religious right. I'm going to start nodding my head to everything they say on Fox news, and I'm going to definitely start going to church. Not that I'll believe in any specific religion anymore than I already do, but because that's what I'm supposed to be doing. I'm going to get a keen interest in football and yell at the tv when my shitty team doesn't win. I'll call the players fuckups and cowards and bitch about how much money they get paid for being as such. In short, I'm going to take up the American Dream and live it baby. Live it large.

No more obscure music, movies, art, anything. It's going to be MTV, FoxNews, and Motherfuckin Will Farrel movies every goddamn day.

My kids will likewise play team sports and eat McDonalds cheesburgers until at age 10 they're 195 pounds and then we'll all go on Biggest Loser together, because a family that eats together can starve together too.

Oh and while I'm at it, I'll buy myself a Mustang on credit, and start cheating on my wife with some gap-toothed chick from work. Because infidelity and wanton materialism is also part of the American Dream.

I'm going to have it all..........

On second thought, nevermind. Happy 4/1